Dudley's dungeon

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Tuesday, 24 April, 2007 by Edrobot
The newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! the.. grid bugThese electronically based creatures are not native to this
universe. They appear to come from a world whose laws of
motion are radically different from ours.

Tron looked to his mate and pilot. "I'm going to check on
the beam connection, Yori. You two can keep a watch out for
grid bugs." Tron paced forward along the slender catwalk
that still seemed awfully insubstantial to Flynn, though he
knew it to be amazingly sturdy. He gazed after Tron, asking
himself what in the world a grid bug was, and hoping that the
beam connection -- to which he'd given no thought whatsoever
until this moment -- was healthy and sound."
[ Tron, novel by Brian Daley, story by Steven Lisberger ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! the.. GWTWOD hits!Your own ghostAnd now the souls of the dead who had gone below came swarming
up from Erebus -- fresh brides, unmarried youths, old men
with life's long suffering behind them, tender young girls
still nursing this first anguish in their hearts, and a great
throng of warriors killed in battle, their spear-wounds gaping
yet and all their armour stained with blood. From this
multitude of souls, as they fluttered to and fro by the
trench, there came a moaning that was horrible to hear.
Panic drained the blood from my cheeks.
[ The Odyssey, (chapter Lambda), by Homer ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! the..... Monty PythonNow the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field
which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea,
hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of
the trees of the garden: but of the fruit of the tree which is
in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of
it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent
said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: for God doth
know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be
opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. And
when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it
was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one
wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also
unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

And the Lord God said unto the woman, What is this that thou
hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I
did eat. And the Lord God said unto the serpent, Because thou
hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above
every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and
dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life: And I will put
enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her
seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
        [ Genesis 3:1-6,13-15 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits!.. .................... ........:J@......... ........G@s......... ........Hxd.........
@ "Ok! This is the last straw!"
d "What's wrong, Dudley?"
....................
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........:J@.........
........G@s.........
........Hxd.........
@ "What's wrong? I keep getting these dumb, overused jokes!"
....................
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........:J@.........
........G@s.........
........Hxd.........
@ "I mean seriously! 'Killed by a newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
'? 'Gnome... And then a gnome came by, carrying a bundle, an old
fellow three times as large as an imp and wearing clothes of
a sort, especially a hat. And he was clearly just as frightened
as the imps though he could not go so fast. Ramon Alonzo
saw that there must be some great trouble that was vexing
magical things; and, since gnomes speak the language of men, and
will answer if spoken to gently, he raised his hat, and asked
of the gnome his name. The gnome did not stop his hasty
shuffle a moment as he answered 'Alaraba' and grabbed the rim
of his hat but forgot to doff it.
'What is the trouble, Alaraba?' said Ramon Alonzo.
'White magic. Run!' said the gnome ..
        [ The Charwoman's Shadow, by Lord Dunsany ]

"Muggles have garden gnomes, too, you know," Harry told Ron as
they crossed the lawn.
"Yeah, I've seen those things they think are gnomes," said Ron,
bent double with his head in a peony bush, "like fat little
Santa Clauses with fishing rods..."
There was a violent scuffling noise, the peony bush shuddered,
and Ron straightened up. "This is a gnome," he said grimly.
"Geroff me! Gerroff me!" squealed the gnome.
It was certainly nothing like Santa Claus. It was small and
leathery looking, with a large, knobby, bald head exactly like
a potato. Ron held it at arm's length as it kicked out at him
with its horny little feet; he grasped it around the ankles
and turned it upside down.
[ Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, by J. K. Rowling ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
with the wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
death[Pestilence:] And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals,
and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four
beasts saying, Come and see. And I saw, and behold a white
horse: and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given
unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer.

[War:] And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the
second beast say, Come and see. And there went out another
horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon
to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one
another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

[Famine:] And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the
third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black
horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his
hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say,
A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley
for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine.

[Death:] And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the
voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. And I looked, and
behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death,
and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over
the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with
hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
[ Revelations of John, 6:1-8 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
'?"
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aaaaa...............
amaa................
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........G@s.........
........Hxd.........
@ "Sure, maybe it was funny, like, the first couple times, they get old fast!"
The bees shout:"WE..
ARE INDIVIDUALS!"...
....................
....aaaaa...........
...maaaa............
....................
........:J@.........
........G@s.........
........Hxd.........
@ "Plus, about half of them are ripped off of 'Monty PythonNow the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field
which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea,
hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of
the trees of the garden: but of the fruit of the tree which is
in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of
it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent
said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: for God doth
know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be
opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. And
when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it
was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one
wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also
unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

And the Lord God said unto the woman, What is this that thou
hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I
did eat. And the Lord God said unto the serpent, Because thou
hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above
every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and
dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life: And I will put
enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her
seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
        [ Genesis 3:1-6,13-15 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
' movies!"
The mimicThe ancestors of the modern day chameleon, these creatures can
assume the form of anything in their surroundings. They may
assume the shape of objects or dungeon features. Unlike the
chameleon though, which assumes the shape of another creature
and goes in hunt of food, the mimic waits patiently for its
meals to come in search of it.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
says:..... "I'm not!".......... .................... .................... .................... .......aaaaa........ .......a:J@a........ .......mG@sa........ ........Hxda........
d "So what are you going to do about it?"
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.......aaaaa........
.......a:J@a........
.......mG@sa........
........Hxda........
This is a scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone,
With many a scalding tear and many a groan,
When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand,
Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand.
I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd
Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd--
I caught a finger: but the downward weight
O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate
The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst
The comfortable sun. I was athirst
To search the book, and in the warming air
Parted its dripping leaves with eager care.
Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on
My soul page after page, till well-nigh won
Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied,
I read these words, and read again, and tried
My eyes against the heavens, and read again.
        [ Endymion, by John Keats ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
of. genocide............ What do you want to. genocide?........... .................... .......aaaaa........ .......a:J@a........ .......mG@sa........ ........Hxda........
@ Overused Jokes
Wiped out overused..
jokes...............
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.........@..........
..........d.........
@ "Wow! That actually worked?"
d "I have a bad feeling about this..."
To be continued!


http://dudley.nicolaas.net
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Rating

01485
Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 18

Comments

Grognor April 24, 2007 01:50
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
It wasn't as bad as the previous two ratings would have you believe.
Ranter April 24, 2007 02:52
First comment: 13 February, 2007 12 comments written
Atleast the overused jokes are gone...right?
Fathead April 24, 2007 03:02
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
I sense a disturbance in the farce....
  April 24, 2007 10:07
First comment: 1 April, 2004 431 comments written
The individual ("I'm not!") joke was actually pretty good, even if they ripped that too from Monty PythonNow the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field
which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea,
hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of
the trees of the garden: but of the fruit of the tree which is
in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of
it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent
said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: for God doth
know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be
opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. And
when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it
was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one
wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also
unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

And the Lord God said unto the woman, What is this that thou
hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I
did eat. And the Lord God said unto the serpent, Because thou
hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above
every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and
dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life: And I will put
enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her
seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
        [ Genesis 3:1-6,13-15 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
.
Mikoangelo April 24, 2007 10:14
First comment: 19 October, 2005 82 comments written
THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME!
Nameless April 24, 2007 10:15
First comment: 29 December, 2004 281 comments written
This does not bode well... lol.
ed_the_robot@yahoo.com April 24, 2007 12:51
First comment: 24 April, 2007 1 comments written
I kinda ripped off the "We are Individuals" Joke from another strip, but that just goes to show how annoying those jokes are.
SQLGuru April 24, 2007 14:42
First comment: 23 October, 2006 77 comments written
Hrmmmm????? If we stop using tired old joke, maybe they will all show up in an Old Jokes Home?
Alcari April 24, 2007 15:22
First comment: 11 September, 2006 93 comments written
It is like a thousands comic writers all cried out in pain, and wereIn 1573, the Parliament of Dole published a decree, permitting
the inhabitants of the Franche-Comte to pursue and kill a
were-wolf or loup-garou, which infested that province,
"notwithstanding the existing laws concerning the chase."
The people were empowered to "assemble with javelins,
halberds, pikes, arquebuses and clubs, to hunt and pursue the
said were-wolf in all places where they could find it, and to
take, burn, and kill it, without incurring any fine or other
penalty." The hunt seems to have been successful, if we may
judge from the fact that the same tribunal in the following
year condemned to be burned a man named Giles Garnier, who
ran on all fours in the forest and fields and devoured little
children, "even on Friday." The poor lycanthrope, it appears,
had as slight respect for ecclesiastical feasts as the French
pig, which was not restrained by any feeling of piety from
eating infants on a fast day.
        [ The History of Vampires, by Dudley Wright ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
suddenly silenced.

http://www.starwars.com/episode-iv/explore/classic/2000/03/classic20000306.html
Jack Simth April 24, 2007 23:07
First comment: 3 January, 2005 59 comments written
Why do I get the impression the next couple of comics will be mostly blank?
Sappho September 11, 2007 00:29
First comment: 6 September, 2007 15 comments written
It must be said: http://xkcd.com/16/
Medardo December 5, 2007 08:53
First comment: 5 December, 2007 23 comments written
The "individual" mimicThe ancestors of the modern day chameleon, these creatures can
assume the form of anything in their surroundings. They may
assume the shape of objects or dungeon features. Unlike the
chameleon though, which assumes the shape of another creature
and goes in hunt of food, the mimic waits patiently for its
meals to come in search of it.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
is good
Quint Sakugarne January 3, 2008 00:30
First comment: 1 January, 2008 233 comments written
I zap my wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
cancellation at the wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
bad puns.

Also, Dogley has a bad feeling about this.

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
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