Dudley's dungeon

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Thursday, 19 October, 2006 by Nameless
As you kick the doorThrough me you pass into the city of woe:
Through me you pass into eternal pain:
Through me among the people lost for aye.
Justice the founder of my fabric mov'd:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love.
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure.
All hope abandon ye who enter here.
        [ The Inferno, from The Divine Comedy of Dante
                Alighieri, translated by H.F. Cary ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
it crashes open! |ZXREM......| ----NXZOL......| ..@.ERTHT....\.| ----MZML.......| |OHRN.......| +XO.........| ---------+------
@ "Surrender, foolish monsters! Make way, or I shall destroy thee for thine inherint evilness!!"
The arch-lichBut on its heels ere the sunset faded, there came a second
apparition, striding with incredible strides and halting when
it loomed almost upon me in the red twilight-the monstrous mummy
of some ancient king still crowned with untarnished gold but
turning to my gaze a visage that more than time or the worm had
wasted. Broken swathings flapped about the skeleton legs, and
above the crown that was set with sapphires and orange rubies, a
black something swayed and nodded horribly; but, for an instant,
I did not dream what it was. Then, in its middle, two oblique
and scarlet eyes opened and glowed like hellish coals, and two
ophidian fangs glittered in an ape-like mouth. A squat, furless,
shapeless head on a neck of disproportionate extent leaned
unspeakably down and whispered in the mummy's ear. Then, with
one stride, the titanic lich took half the distance between us,
and from out the folds of the tattered sere-cloth a gaunt arm
arose, and fleshless, taloned fingers laden with glowering gems,
reached out and fumbled for my throat . . .
        [ The Abominations of Yondo, Clark Ashton Smith, 1926 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
flees in terror! <More> |.ZXREL.....| ----.NXZOM.....| ...@%%T%.....\.| ----..Z.T......| |MOMRL......| +XHO.N......| ---------+------
L "Run! Flee! It's Dudley the Mage! Our doom is upon us!"
The XornA distant cousin of the earth elemental, the xorn has the
ability to shift the cells of its body around in such a way
that it becomes porous to inert material. This gives it the
ability to pass through any obstacle that might be between it
and its next meal.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
is caught i the fireball! <More> |..ZXREL....| ----.%%%.OM....| ...@%%%%.....\.| ----..%..L.....| |.MOMRT.....| +.XHO.N.....| ---------+------
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "Okay that's not exactly how it happened. But it would have been cool, hey?"
Alternate ending: Reality hits! You die. Alternate ending to the alternate ending: Reality hits! You wake up.


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Rating

00364
Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 13

Comments

Dav October 19, 2006 00:06
First comment: 26 June, 2004 147 comments written
I think a better punchline would have been "You wake up." or something to that effect. Still good though.
Jac October 19, 2006 01:38
First comment: 26 May, 2006 48 comments written
"The XornA distant cousin of the earth elemental, the xorn has the
ability to shift the cells of its body around in such a way
that it becomes porous to inert material. This gives it the
ability to pass through any obstacle that might be between it
and its next meal.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
resists!"
L October 19, 2006 09:58
First comment: 10 February, 2005 285 comments written
The return of the storyteller on the wooded hill!
Roger Barnett October 19, 2006 13:27
First comment: 7 April, 2006 143 comments written
Perhaps just a fraction of exaggeration there.
scwizard October 23, 2006 03:28
First comment: 18 August, 2006 12 comments written
Arch-lichBut on its heels ere the sunset faded, there came a second
apparition, striding with incredible strides and halting when
it loomed almost upon me in the red twilight-the monstrous mummy
of some ancient king still crowned with untarnished gold but
turning to my gaze a visage that more than time or the worm had
wasted. Broken swathings flapped about the skeleton legs, and
above the crown that was set with sapphires and orange rubies, a
black something swayed and nodded horribly; but, for an instant,
I did not dream what it was. Then, in its middle, two oblique
and scarlet eyes opened and glowed like hellish coals, and two
ophidian fangs glittered in an ape-like mouth. A squat, furless,
shapeless head on a neck of disproportionate extent leaned
unspeakably down and whispered in the mummy's ear. Then, with
one stride, the titanic lich took half the distance between us,
and from out the folds of the tattered sere-cloth a gaunt arm
arose, and fleshless, taloned fingers laden with glowering gems,
reached out and fumbled for my throat . . .
        [ The Abominations of Yondo, Clark Ashton Smith, 1926 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
's are such cowards.
Fathead October 30, 2006 21:28
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
Goodness. Well, at least he survived.
Grognor April 20, 2007 07:18
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
Xorns=fire resistance.

Dav, that's at the bottom.

Fathead, he died later to a horrible, slow death[Pestilence:] And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals,
and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four
beasts saying, Come and see. And I saw, and behold a white
horse: and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given
unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer.

[War:] And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the
second beast say, Come and see. And there went out another
horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon
to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one
another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

[Famine:] And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the
third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black
horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his
hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say,
A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley
for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine.

[Death:] And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the
voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. And I looked, and
behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death,
and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over
the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with
hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
[ Revelations of John, 6:1-8 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
at the hands of cancer.


http://dudley.nicolaas.net
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@nicolaas.net!
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