Dudley's dungeon

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Friday, 29 September, 2006

by L

### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "Dudley!" @ "Wes! Where've you been?"	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "I've completed the initiation questMany, possibly most, Tours are organized as a Quest. This is like a large-scale treasure hunt, with clues scattered all over the continent, a few false leads, Mystical Masters as game-show hosts, and the Dark Lord and the Terrain to make the Quest interestingly difficult. [...] In order to be assured of your future custom, the Management has a further Rule: Tourists, far from being rewarded for achieving their Quest Object, must then go on to conquer the Dark Lord or set about Saving the World, or both. And why not? By then you will have had a lot of practice in that sort of thing and, besides, the Quest Object is usually designed to help you do it. [ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.!" @ "Initiation questMany, possibly most, Tours are organized as a Quest. This is like a large-scale treasure hunt, with clues scattered all over the continent, a few false leads, Mystical Masters as game-show hosts, and the Dark Lord and the Terrain to make the Quest interestingly difficult. [...] In order to be assured of your future custom, the Management has a further Rule: Tourists, far from being rewarded for achieving their Quest Object, must then go on to conquer the Dark Lord or set about Saving the World, or both. And why not? By then you will have had a lot of practice in that sort of thing and, besides, the Quest Object is usually designed to help you do it. [ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.?"	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "You know, the newcomer's ritual? The first test for a NetHacker?"	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "Dogley told me all about it, and I did it! Here, take a look:"
### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "A plaid potionPOTABLE, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only when suffering from the recurrent disorder known as thirst, for which it is a medicine. Upon nothing has so great and diligent ingenuity been brought to bear in all ages and in all countries, except the most uncivilized, as upon the invention of substitutes for water. To hold that this general aversion to that liquid has no basis in the preservative instinct of the race is to be unscientific -- and without science we are as the snakes and toads. [ The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., a left-handed magic markerThe pen is mightier than the sword. [ Richelieu, by Edward Bulwer-Lytton ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., a can of elbow greaseANOINT, v.t. To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery. [ The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details...."	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "...a non-large boxDantes rapidly cleared away the earth around the chest. Soon the center lock appeared, then the handles at each end, all delicately wrought in the manner of that period when art made precious even the basest of metals. He took the chest by the two handles and tried to lift it, but it was impossible. He tried to open it; it was locked. He inserted the sharp end of his pickaxe between the chest and the lid and pushed down on the handle. The lid creaked, then flew open. Dantes was seized with a sort of giddy fever. He cocked his gun and placed it beside him. The he closed his eyes like a child, opened them and stood dumbfounded. The chest was divided into three compartments. In the first were shining gold coins. In the second, unpolished gold ingots packed in orderly stacks. From the third compartment, which was half full, Dantes picked up handfuls of diamonds, pearls and rubies. As they fell through his fingers in a glittering cascade, they gave forth the sound of hail beating against the windowpanes. [ The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., a scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone, With many a scalding tear and many a groan, When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand, Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand. I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd-- I caught a finger: but the downward weight O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst The comfortable sun. I was athirst To search the book, and in the warming air Parted its dripping leaves with eager care. Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on My soul page after page, till well-nigh won Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied, I read these words, and read again, and tried My eyes against the heavens, and read again. [ Endymion, by John Keats ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. labelled BOON A MI EM KCIK backwards...."	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "...and a tin of"You know salmon, Sarge," said Nobby. "It is a fish of which I am aware, yes." "You know they sell kind of slices of it in tins..." "So I am given to understand, yes." "Weell...how come all the tins are the same size? Salmon gets thinner at both ends." "Interesting point, Nobby. I think-" [ Soul Music, by Terry Pratchett ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. soup made from invisible black lightStrange creatures formed from energy rather than matter, lights are given to self-destructive behavior when battling foes. Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.."	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "The last one was a little tricky, though, cause at first I thought..."
### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "'If it's invisible, how can it also be black?'"	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "But then I realised..."	### ---------- #### \|....>.... # \|......... #####-@...@.... \|......... ---------- @ "Wait, Wes. Where'd you get all this stuff?"	Moments later... ---------- .........\| ......^..\| ....@....\| ......@..\| ---------- @ "Wes... you realise that you've discovered... the Paradoxical PortalPortals can be Mirrors, Pictures, Standing Stones, Stone Circles, Windows, and special gates set up for the purpose. You will travel through them both to distant parts of the continent and to and from our own world. The precise manner of their working is a Management secret. [ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.?!"
http://dudley.nicolaas.net

To be continued...

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Average rating: Fair
Number of ratings: 15

Comments

shel	September 29, 2006 00:51
First comment: 19 August, 2005	107 comments written
a non-large boxDantes rapidly cleared away the earth around the chest. Soon the center lock appeared, then the handles at each end, all delicately wrought in the manner of that period when art made precious even the basest of metals. He took the chest by the two handles and tried to lift it, but it was impossible. He tried to open it; it was locked. He inserted the sharp end of his pickaxe between the chest and the lid and pushed down on the handle. The lid creaked, then flew open. Dantes was seized with a sort of giddy fever. He cocked his gun and placed it beside him. The he closed his eyes like a child, opened them and stood dumbfounded. The chest was divided into three compartments. In the first were shining gold coins. In the second, unpolished gold ingots packed in orderly stacks. From the third compartment, which was half full, Dantes picked up handfuls of diamonds, pearls and rubies. As they fell through his fingers in a glittering cascade, they gave forth the sound of hail beating against the windowpanes. [ The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.. heh.
Alcari	September 29, 2006 09:23
First comment: 11 September, 2006	93 comments written
hehehe, i'm liking these comics. of course, now comes level 2. Where you need to find some blinker fluid, compression air and keys to the landing zone.
Arch Leech	September 29, 2006 19:10
First comment: 28 September, 2006	8 comments written
"But then I realised..." Well? Realised what? We wereIn 1573, the Parliament of Dole published a decree, permitting the inhabitants of the Franche-Comte to pursue and kill a were-wolf or loup-garou, which infested that province, "notwithstanding the existing laws concerning the chase." The people were empowered to "assemble with javelins, halberds, pikes, arquebuses and clubs, to hunt and pursue the said were-wolf in all places where they could find it, and to take, burn, and kill it, without incurring any fine or other penalty." The hunt seems to have been successful, if we may judge from the fact that the same tribunal in the following year condemned to be burned a man named Giles Garnier, who ran on all fours in the forest and fields and devoured little children, "even on Friday." The poor lycanthrope, it appears, had as slight respect for ecclesiastical feasts as the French pig, which was not restrained by any feeling of piety from eating infants on a fast day. [ The History of Vampires, by Dudley Wright ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. about to find out the mystery of the constitution of invisible black lights!
SomeoneElse	September 30, 2006 01:09
First comment: 11 September, 2006	143 comments written
Why has this one gotten such bad ratings? I liked it.
Gadora	September 30, 2006 02:07
First comment: 21 September, 2006	88 comments written
Hey, I've caught up. Woo hoo! Arch Leech: They only look black if you have see invisible.
G	September 30, 2006 04:47
First comment: 5 October, 2005	82 comments written
Someone Else: Perhaps because there's no punch line. That's why I wasn't impressed.
Mikoangelo	September 30, 2006 16:38
First comment: 19 October, 2005	82 comments written
Well, it does say "To Be Continued"(tm), so I suppose the fairly odd punchline is acceptable.
Arch Leech	October 2, 2006 21:31
First comment: 28 September, 2006	8 comments written
Gadora: But then what does black lightStrange creatures formed from energy rather than matter, lights are given to self-destructive behavior when battling foes. Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. look like?
Gadora	October 3, 2006 00:52
First comment: 21 September, 2006	88 comments written
Arch Leech: Uh... It looks like a disco ball, made out of anti-matter.
Fathead	October 4, 2006 23:14
First comment: 1 April, 2006	1136 comments written
Nah, from my point of view, that's a vortexSwirling clouds of pure elemental energies, the vortices are thought to be related to the larger elementals. Though the vortices do no damage when touched, they are noted for being able to envelop unwary travellers. The hapless fool thus swallowed by a vortex will soon perish from exposure to the element the vortex is composed of. Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., not a stairs or a trap.
Kerta	December 14, 2007 09:22
First comment: 12 December, 2007	72 comments written
What? No cannon report?
Dani	June 12, 2008 19:05
First comment: 7 June, 2008	39 comments written
Reminds me of when, in chemistry class, the teacher sent one of us to fetch a round ruler. We lol'd for hours on end, and that guy was nowhere to be seen.

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@nicolaas.net!

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