Dudley's dungeon

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Monday, 26 March, 2007 by Dol
You smell marsh gas!
                    
               -----
        #@d####....<
        #      |....
#########      |....
               ---+-
                    
                    
@ "Eww...it wasn't me."
d "Hey, me neither! Don't give me that look!"
It looks rather     
muddy down here.    
  --------          
  |.}.}.}|          
  |}.}g}.@d#########
  |.}.}.}|          
  --------          
                    
                    
g "A promising young man there I see!"
@ "Umm..."
A few thousand      
turns later...      
--             #####
}|             #    
.g#######d@#####    
}|                  
--                  
                    
                    
The doorThrough me you pass into the city of woe:
Through me you pass into eternal pain:
Through me among the people lost for aye.
Justice the founder of my fabric mov'd:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love.
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure.
All hope abandon ye who enter here.
        [ The Inferno, from The Divine Comedy of Dante
                Alighieri, translated by H.F. Cary ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
unlocks! ------- #####.d..<.| # |.@...| ## |....)| ---+---
@ "Let's try how it works. #force!"
d "Now that's odd."
The saberFlashed all their sabres bare,
Flashed as they turned in air,
Sab'ring the gunners there,
Charging an army, while
All the world wondered:
Plunged in the battery smoke,
Right through the line they broke;
Cossack and Russian
Reeled from the sabre-stroke
Shattered and sundered.
Then they rode back, but not--
Not the six hundred.
        [ The Charge of the Light Brigade,
         by Alfred, Lord Tennyson ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
vibrates! l - a silver saberFlashed all their sabres bare,
Flashed as they turned in air,
Sab'ring the gunners there,
Charging an army, while
All the world wondered:
Plunged in the battery smoke,
Right through the line they broke;
Cossack and Russian
Reeled from the sabre-stroke
Shattered and sundered.
Then they rode back, but not--
Not the six hundred.
        [ The Charge of the Light Brigade,
         by Alfred, Lord Tennyson ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
------- #####....<.| # |.d...| ## |..@..| ---+---
The dwarfDwarfs have faces like men (ugly men, with wrinkled, leathery
skins), but are generally either flat-footed, duck-footed, or
have feet pointing backwards. They are of the earth, earthy,
living in the darkest of caverns and venturing forth only
with the cloaks by which they can make themselves invisible,
and others disguised as toads. Miners often come across them,
and sometimes establish reasonably close relations with them.
... The miners of Cornwall were always delighted to hear a
bucca busily mining away, for all dwarfs have an infallible
nose for precious metals.
Among other things, dwarfs are rightly valued for their skill
as blacksmiths and jewellers: they made Odin his famous spear
Gungnir, and Thor his hammer; for Freya they designed a
magnificent necklace, and for Frey a golden boar. And in their
spare time they are excellent bakers. Ironically, despite
their odd feet, they are particularly fond of dancing. They
can also see into the future, and consequently are excellent
meteorologists. They can be free with presents to people
they like, and a dwarvish gift is likely to turn to gold in
the hand. But on the whole they are a snappish lot.
[ The Immortals, by Derek and Julia Parker ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
is frozen in place! ....| --|-- # # |.. ##########d@[ |h.
@ "Unlimited power!"
d "This cannot lead to anything good."
m - an opera cloakCloaks are the universal outer garb of everyone who is not a
Barbarian. It is hard to see why. They are open in front
and require you at most times to use one hand to hold them
shut. On horseback they leave the shirt-sleeved arms and
most of the torso exposed to wind and Weather. The OMTs
[ Official Management Terms ] for Cloaks well express their
difficulties. They are constantly _swirling and dripping_
and becoming _heavy with water_ in rainy Weather, _entangling
with trees_ or _swords_, or needing to be _pulled close
around her/his shivering body_. This seems to suggest they
are less than practical for anyone on an arduous Tour.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
|... #######-d@[ |h..
@ "Fits nicely, doesn't it?"
d "I have a bad feeling about this."
n - a helm of       
opposite alignment  
                    
                    
       | ...        
#######- d@.        
       | ...        
                    
                    
@ "Hmmm..."
d "NOOOOO!!!!"
Magical breathing, anyone?


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Rating

002126
Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 20

Comments

Slowpoke March 26, 2007 01:55
First comment: 27 February, 2007 239 comments written
Can't quite give it an E for Effort, but a G for Georgelucas seems more correct than the low ratings so far.
Kernigh March 26, 2007 02:37
First comment: 6 April, 2005 349 comments written
It is normally more difficult to find the dungeon level with the correct marsh: http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/965.html
L March 26, 2007 08:25
First comment: 10 February, 2005 285 comments written
It seems that Fido is the one appearing in today's comic. Dogley would never debase himself with one of those jokes.
Dav March 26, 2007 17:41
First comment: 26 June, 2004 147 comments written
Dudley will never need a wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
lightning again.
Rose March 26, 2007 19:17
First comment: 3 July, 2006 79 comments written
So that's how DV really began! I knew it couldn't be that silly story they told us in Star Wars III! :D
Epsilon March 29, 2007 11:41
First comment: 29 March, 2007 2 comments written
Having finally finished the archives... I can post!
This one made me LMAO. Although, really, it should have been Dudley (Dudley Vader the Priest[...] For the two priests were talking exactly like priests,
piously, with learning and leisure, about the most aerial
enigmas of theology. The little Essex priest spoke the more
simply, with his round face turned to the strengthening stars;
the other talked with his head bowed, as if he were not even
worthy to look at them. But no more innocently clerical
conversation could have been heard in any white Italian cloister
or black Spanish cathedral. The first he heard was the tail of
one of Father Brown's sentences, which ended: "... what they
really meant in the Middle Ages by the heavens being
incorruptible." The taller priest nodded his bowed head and
said: "Ah, yes, these modern infidels appeal to their reason;
but who can look at those millions of worlds and not feel that
there may well be wonderful universes above us where reason is
utterly unreasonable?"
        [ The Innocence of Father Brown, by G.K. Chesterton ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
? I find your lack of faith disturbing...) who screamed that, since Vader does it so damned often in the movie.
Fathead April 1, 2007 00:42
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
The farce is with us, Master.
Grognor April 22, 2007 10:03
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
I can't say I get it.

You polymorph into a flaming sphereThe attack by those who want to die -- this is the attack
against which you cannot prepare a perfect defense.
                                --Human aphorism
        [ The Dosadi Experiment, by Frank Herbert ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
!
BOOM

Grognor explodes! You die...

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