Dudley's dungeon

Home Comments Archive Print


Wednesday, 15 February, 2006 by Nameless
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "Come on Uncle Nam! Tell us another story!"
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "Well... alright. Just one more. But then it's bedtime!"
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "This knightHere lies the noble fearless knight,
Whose valour rose to such a height;
When Death at last had struck him down,
His was the victory and renown.
He reck'd the world of little prize,
And was a bugbear in men's eyes;
But had the fortune in his age
To live a fool and die a sage.
        [ Don Quixote of La Mancha by Miquel de
         Cervantes Saavedra ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
was already powerful and rich, but sought adventure to bring glory to his godGoddesses and Gods operate in ones, threesomes, or whole
pantheons of nine or more (see Religion). Most of them claim
to have made the world, and this is indeed a likely claim in
the case of threesomes or pantheons: Fantasyland does have
the air of having been made by a committee. But all Goddesses
and Gods, whether they say they made the world or not, have
very detailed short-term plans for it which they are determined
to carry out. Consequently they tend to push people into the
required actions by the use of coincidence or Prophecy, or just
by narrowing down your available choices of what to do next:
if a deity is pushing you, things will go miserably badly until
there is only one choice left to you.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
."
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "So gathering his trusty sword and shield, he rode bravely forth towards his destiny!"
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
..#.#.##.}}}#.#.#.#.
#..#.#.....}}#.#.##.
.#.#........}}.#.#.#
.#.#.....#...}}####.
#.#......@....}}}..#
.##............#.}}}
.#.#...@@@@@....##}}
#.#.##..@@@...#.##..
#.##.#.##.#..#.#.###
@ "So they sent Dudley instead."


http://dudley.nicolaas.net
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@nicolaas.net!
Powered by Nics
<< Previous<< First Random  Today >> Next >>

Rating

03474
Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 18

Comments

Mr. DOS February 15, 2006 21:37
First comment: 10 January, 2006 40 comments written
That HAD to be a newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
joke, didn't it?

--- Mr. DOS
Grey Knight February 16, 2006 13:24
First comment: 20 October, 2005 116 comments written
Waitaminute. There was a fiendish and dangerous newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
guarding the area, so Dudley was chosen to defeat it? Something about this doesn't add up...
AEthelwulf-Kni-Hum-Mal February 17, 2006 19:46
First comment: 5 March, 2005 8 comments written
Clearly a fictional tale. Everyone knows that the requisite ignominious death[Pestilence:] And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals,
and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four
beasts saying, Come and see. And I saw, and behold a white
horse: and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given
unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer.

[War:] And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the
second beast say, Come and see. And there went out another
horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon
to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one
another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

[Famine:] And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the
third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black
horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his
hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say,
A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley
for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine.

[Death:] And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the
voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. And I looked, and
behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death,
and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over
the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with
hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
[ Revelations of John, 6:1-8 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
for a knightHere lies the noble fearless knight,
Whose valour rose to such a height;
When Death at last had struck him down,
His was the victory and renown.
He reck'd the world of little prize,
And was a bugbear in men's eyes;
But had the fortune in his age
To live a fool and die a sage.
        [ Don Quixote of La Mancha by Miquel de
         Cervantes Saavedra ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
is falling while trying to mount his saddled pony        Hey! now! Come hoy now! Whither do you wander?
        Up, down, near or far, here, there or yonder?
        Sharp-ears, Wise-nose, Swish-tail and Bumpkin,
        White-socks my little lad, and old Fatty Lumpkin!

[...]
Tom called them one by one and they climbed over the brow and
stood in a line. Then Tom bowed to the hobbits.

"Here are your ponies, now!" he said. "They've more sense (in some
ways) than you wandering hobbits have -- more sense in their noses.
For they sniff danger ahead which you walk right into; and if they
run to save themselves, then they run the right way."
        [ The Fellowship of the Ring, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
, on turn one.

(Been there...)
anticheese@gmail.com February 22, 2006 21:09
First comment: 22 December, 2005 6 comments written
You do not pass go, you do not collect 200 zorkmids.

Classic, Best served when playing a wizardEbenezum walked before me along the closest thing we could
find to a path in these overgrown woods. Every few paces he
would pause, so that I, burdened with a pack stuffed with
arcane and heavy paraphernalia, could catch up with his
wizardly strides. He, as usual, carried nothing, preferring,
as he often said, to keep his hands free for quick conjuring
and his mind free for the thoughts of a mage.
        [ A Dealing with Demons, by Craig Shaw Gardner ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
and zapping ones self and pet with a wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
death[Pestilence:] And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals,
and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four
beasts saying, Come and see. And I saw, and behold a white
horse: and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given
unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer.

[War:] And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the
second beast say, Come and see. And there went out another
horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon
to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one
another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

[Famine:] And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the
third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black
horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his
hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say,
A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley
for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine.

[Death:] And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the
voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. And I looked, and
behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death,
and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over
the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with
hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
[ Revelations of John, 6:1-8 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
.
Aeschylus February 23, 2006 04:17
First comment: 2 December, 2005 22 comments written
"He may look like a shaved testicle, but he's expend~ I mean dependable." -Ctrl-Alt-Del
Fathead July 19, 2006 23:45
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
Irony?
Fathead July 25, 2006 19:59
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
The Newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
Comics
(63)
http://www.nicolaas.net/dudley/index.php?f=20060202 Previous
http://www.nicolaas.net/dudley/index.php?f=20060525 Next
Sirbina September 5, 2006 18:32
First comment: 26 August, 2006 11 comments written
"Whereupon" is one word.
Grognor April 18, 2007 01:49
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
I don't quite understand it either.
Quint Sakugarne January 2, 2008 05:33
First comment: 1 January, 2008 233 comments written
I LOVE these "displacement" jokes.

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@nicolaas.net!
Powered by Nics
<< Previous<< First Random  Today >> Next >>