Dudley's dungeon

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Friday, 13 April, 2007 by Edrobot
                    
                    
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d "Well kids, it's that time again!"
                    
                    
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@ "Kids? What are you talking about? None of our fans are kids!"
                    
                    
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@ "30 year-old NetHack players, yes, miscella-
neous computer geeks, possibly, but KIDS?"
q - a scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone,
With many a scalding tear and many a groan,
When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand,
Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand.
I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd
Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd--
I caught a finger: but the downward weight
O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate
The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst
The comfortable sun. I was athirst
To search the book, and in the warming air
Parted its dripping leaves with eager care.
Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on
My soul page after page, till well-nigh won
Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied,
I read these words, and read again, and tried
My eyes against the heavens, and read again.
        [ Endymion, by John Keats ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
of mail -------- |......| |..<...| |.&@d..+######## |......| ----+--- #
d *sigh* "It's a figure of speech. Anyway, it's time to open fan mail!"
                    
                    
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d "Dudley, the letter please!"
@ "Um, Dogley, this isn't adressed to you..."
                    
                    
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d "WHAT! Don't tell me it's for you!"
@ "Um, apparently it's for..."
                    
                    
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A voice booms out:  
"Did somebody say my
name?"------        
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@ "Gahh! What are you doing here? I haven't even gotten to Glendenholm yet!"
                    
                    
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@ "What? Can't I make an apperance just to say 'hi!'?"
                    
                    
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@ "Nope."
d "Not really."
Rodney steals your  
scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone,
With many a scalding tear and many a groan,
When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand,
Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand.
I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd
Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd--
I caught a finger: but the downward weight
O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate
The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst
The comfortable sun. I was athirst
To search the book, and in the warming air
Parted its dripping leaves with eager care.
Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on
My soul page after page, till well-nigh won
Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied,
I read these words, and read again, and tried
My eyes against the heavens, and read again.
        [ Endymion, by John Keats ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
of fan mail! -------- |......| |..<...| |..@d..+######## |..@...| ----+--- #
@ "Tough beans. Give me that!"
                    
                    
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@ "Dear Rodney, what do you do on your spare time?"
                    
                    
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@ "Now that, my friend, is an excellent question! Allow me to explain..."
A voice booms out:  
"So, you thought you
could kill me?"-    
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####################
  #                 
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@ "As you know, I have to work double shifts on both NetHack and SLASH'EM..."
Rodney says: you    
will die on level 2.
That will be $5.- --
[[[[||@.| |?G??k| |@
[[[@||@.| |k?h?@| |?
-+----+-----+-------
..G...........G.....
......G....G........
--------------------
@ "...but I also freelance as a fortune teller at malls..."
The newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
bluffs! The GWTWOD zaps a wand'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
of cheating!...| |...__@__...| |../ ] \..| |.@|] $ ]|G.| |..\__]__/..| |.....:.....| -----+-------
@ "...and on Thursdays, I get together with some friends to play poker!"
The zombieThe zombi... is a soulless human corpse, still dead, but
taken from the grave and endowed by sorcery with a
mechanical semblance of life, -- it is a dead body which is
made to walk and act and move as if it were alive.
        [ W. B. Seabrook ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! You die................# #### ########### ### ........# #..... ........# #..... ######### ##.### ################.# .........Z@......# ##################
@ "I dabble in other Roguelikes, but I never seemed to get the hang of them..."
|Hello, Rodney!    |
|Welcome to NetHack|
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|Rodney the WizardEbenezum walked before me along the closest thing we could
find to a path in these overgrown woods. Every few paces he
would pause, so that I, burdened with a pack stuffed with
arcane and heavy paraphernalia, could catch up with his
wizardly strides. He, as usual, carried nothing, preferring,
as he often said, to keep his hands free for quick conjuring
and his mind free for the thoughts of a mage.
        [ A Dealing with Demons, by Craig Shaw Gardner ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
| |hp:10 p:9 xp:1/0 | --------------------
@ "And at the end of the day, I like to wind down with a calming game of NetHack?"
                    
                    
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@ "Wait, how can you PLAY NetHack when you're IN NetHack?
                    
                    
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@ "Well, um, there's a good story about that... and..."
                    
                    
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@ "Oh! look over there!"
                    
                    
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@ "Where?!?!"
@ Teleport away
                    
                    
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@ "Not again!"
d *sigh*
Technically, this is the sequel to the "Life and Times of the Wizard of Yendor" comic


http://dudley.nicolaas.net
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Rating

22550
Average rating: Fair
Number of ratings: 14

Comments

Dion April 13, 2007 12:27
First comment: 2 February, 2004 100 comments written
Apologies for the inconvenience. Nobody knows why comments and ratings sometimes break.
Dion April 13, 2007 12:42
First comment: 2 February, 2004 100 comments written
New Feature! Every time you comment on a comic, or rate one, your cookie will be refreshed. So frequent posters will no longer be forgotten...
Maisoul April 13, 2007 13:04
First comment: 13 April, 2007 1 comments written
Much more interesting than hearing about Dudley again.
Dav April 13, 2007 21:42
First comment: 26 June, 2004 147 comments written
That is a good feature.
Mumakil April 13, 2007 23:21
First comment: 5 June, 2006 5 comments written
Way too long and boring if you ask me. Also lacks a good pun...
Ridiculous Sword April 14, 2007 07:08
First comment: 14 April, 2007 3 comments written
I'm only 10 years old.
Rodan April 14, 2007 17:40
First comment: 28 March, 2007 15 comments written
and I'm twelve. Does that count?
Ridiculous Sword April 14, 2007 22:02
First comment: 14 April, 2007 3 comments written
No it doesn't,Rodan.

Now taste my +6 unholy vorpal"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand;
Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
                        [ Jabberwocky, by Lewis Carroll ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
defender frost-brand flame-tongue unsun luck blades of wounding, sharpness, dancing, contradisruption, never missing, slaying everything, thunderbolts, throwing, speed, quickness, all dragonIn the West the dragon was the natural enemy of man. Although
preferring to live in bleak and desolate regions, whenever it
was seen among men it left in its wake a trail of destruction
and disease. Yet any attempt to slay this beast was a perilous
undertaking. For the dragon's assailant had to contend
not only with clouds of sulphurous fumes pouring from its fire
breathing nostrils, but also with the thrashings of its tail,
the most deadly part of its serpent-like body.
[ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library) ]

"One whom the dragons will speak with," he said, "that is a
dragonlord, or at least that is the center of the matter. It's
not a trick of mastering the dragons, as most people think.
Dragons have no masters. The question is always the same, with
a dragon: will he talk to you or will he eat you? If you can
count upon his doing the former, and not doing the latter, why
then you're a dragonlord."
        [ The Tombs of Atuan, by Ursula K. Le Guin ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
slayer, life stealing, and nine lives stealing, with intelligence 17, speech and telepathy, ten non-alignment languages, eight extraordinary powers, eight special purposes, and artifact abilities sword of DOOM!


If you don't get my name, or my weapon, too bad. You don't know what your missing.
Rodan April 15, 2007 12:12
First comment: 28 March, 2007 15 comments written
Oh, I get it.
Feory April 15, 2007 13:52
First comment: 15 August, 2006 63 comments written
"...slaying everything...all dragonIn the West the dragon was the natural enemy of man. Although
preferring to live in bleak and desolate regions, whenever it
was seen among men it left in its wake a trail of destruction
and disease. Yet any attempt to slay this beast was a perilous
undertaking. For the dragon's assailant had to contend
not only with clouds of sulphurous fumes pouring from its fire
breathing nostrils, but also with the thrashings of its tail,
the most deadly part of its serpent-like body.
[ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library) ]

"One whom the dragons will speak with," he said, "that is a
dragonlord, or at least that is the center of the matter. It's
not a trick of mastering the dragons, as most people think.
Dragons have no masters. The question is always the same, with
a dragon: will he talk to you or will he eat you? If you can
count upon his doing the former, and not doing the latter, why
then you're a dragonlord."
        [ The Tombs of Atuan, by Ursula K. Le Guin ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
slayer..."

Slays dragons twice as much, does it?
Ridiculous Sword April 15, 2007 19:23
First comment: 14 April, 2007 3 comments written
Yes, yes it does. And no, my name 'Ridiculous Sword' doesn't mean my sword is ridiculous.

You guessed wrong, Rodan, now prepare to be cooked by a 97010d6 lightning bolt.
Fathead April 17, 2007 03:09
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
That was mildly amusing.
Rodan April 19, 2007 21:30
First comment: 28 March, 2007 15 comments written
oh, I get it... don't worry...
Grognor April 22, 2007 10:26
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
Nah.
Antheridium May 20, 2007 20:18
First comment: 17 May, 2007 442 comments written
x - a ridiculous sword named Excalipoor.

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
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