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Dudley's dungeon -- Thursday, 30 November, 2006

Dudley's dungeon

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Thursday, 30 November, 2006 by Nameless
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
misses. VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
just misses. ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
just misses. ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "He's called the impaler, but he 'vants' to suck my blood, so instead he just *hits* me?"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
just misses. VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
misses. ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "Hmmm... I know!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits. VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impervious You hit VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
! Your spell hits VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
! |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "Why won't you DIE?!?!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impala VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
kicks. ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@u.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "..."
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impartial |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@..V.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impassioned VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
V "YOU BASTARD!! You killed my son! AAAAAARRGGHH!!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impossible |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@..¥.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
¥ "Fear my nonexistance! Fear it!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the imperceptible ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@..\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "Damn it, where's he gone?"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impersonate |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |...@.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "I vant to suck your blood! I vant to suck your blood!!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the imploring |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
V "Please just leave the dungeon. Aw, come on. Please guys?"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the imploder |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@e./.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "This can't go well."
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impediment G - a cursed VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
Your movements are slowed slightly because of your load |.@./.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impolite |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
V "You %&$@ing
%&$@tacular
%&$@er!! %&$@ the %&$@ off!!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impregnator |(| |(| |(| ---|---|---|--- |.......-.-...| ---|----|.|---- |@V.\.|.->| ---+----|.|---- |.......+.+...| ---+---+---+---
@ "Just... no. Let's not even go there."


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Rating

0121025
Average rating: Excellent
Number of ratings: 38

Comments

Luos November 30, 2006 00:17
First comment: 13 November, 2005 29 comments written
Just last one was remotely funny... fair
Jac November 30, 2006 02:04
First comment: 26 May, 2006 48 comments written
The yen is back! More yen! More American Idol auditions!
flatluigi November 30, 2006 02:50
First comment: 23 November, 2006 28 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impersonator -- "The newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! The newt(kinds of) small animal, like a lizard, which spends most of
its time in the water.
        [ Oxford's Student's Dictionary of Current English ]

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
        [ Macbeth, by William Shakespeare ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! You die..."
L November 30, 2006 04:01
First comment: 10 February, 2005 285 comments written
CurseCurses are longstanding ill-wishings which, in Fantasyland,
often manifest as semisentient. They have to be broken or
dispelled. The method varies according to the type and
origin of the Curse:
[...]
4. Curses on Rings and Swords. You have problems. Rings
have to be returned whence they came, preferably at over a
thousand degrees Fahrenheit, and the Curse means you won't
want to do this. Swords usually resist all attempts to
raise their Curses. Your best source is to hide the Sword
or give it to someone you dislike.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
you, Nameless!!
Nameless November 30, 2006 04:59
First comment: 29 December, 2004 281 comments written
L - Uh, what?
Grey Knight November 30, 2006 07:41
First comment: 20 October, 2005 116 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Imploder was my favourite. :-)
A November 30, 2006 12:38
First comment: 24 October, 2006 70 comments written
Some of those wereIn 1573, the Parliament of Dole published a decree, permitting
the inhabitants of the Franche-Comte to pursue and kill a
were-wolf or loup-garou, which infested that province,
"notwithstanding the existing laws concerning the chase."
The people were empowered to "assemble with javelins,
halberds, pikes, arquebuses and clubs, to hunt and pursue the
said were-wolf in all places where they could find it, and to
take, burn, and kill it, without incurring any fine or other
penalty." The hunt seems to have been successful, if we may
judge from the fact that the same tribunal in the following
year condemned to be burned a man named Giles Garnier, who
ran on all fours in the forest and fields and devoured little
children, "even on Friday." The poor lycanthrope, it appears,
had as slight respect for ecclesiastical feasts as the French
pig, which was not restrained by any feeling of piety from
eating infants on a fast day.
        [ The History of Vampires, by Dudley Wright ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
really good.
Turing November 30, 2006 14:52
First comment: 22 March, 2006 4 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impediment cracked me up.
Alcari November 30, 2006 16:26
First comment: 11 September, 2006 93 comments written
ahh, real comics, funny to.
Roger Barnett November 30, 2006 16:38
First comment: 7 April, 2006 143 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Innocent?

"No! It wasn't me! The WizardEbenezum walked before me along the closest thing we could
find to a path in these overgrown woods. Every few paces he
would pause, so that I, burdened with a pack stuffed with
arcane and heavy paraphernalia, could catch up with his
wizardly strides. He, as usual, carried nothing, preferring,
as he often said, to keep his hands free for quick conjuring
and his mind free for the thoughts of a mage.
        [ A Dealing with Demons, by Craig Shaw Gardner ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
's got the CandelabrumFaustus: Come on Mephistopheles. What shall we do?
Mephistopheles: Nay, I know not. We shall be cursed with bell,
book, and candle.
Faustus: How? Bell, book, and candle, candle, book, and bell,
Forward and backward, to curse Faustus to hell.
Anon you shall hear a hog grunt, a calf bleat, and an ass bray,
Because it is Saint Peter's holy day.
(Enter all the Friars to sing the dirge)
        [ Doctor Faustus and Other Plays, by Christopher Marlowe ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
, I swear!"
Fathead November 30, 2006 19:36
First comment: 1 April, 2006 1136 comments written
Not bad. I don't know why I'm only giving it a G.
Keiseth November 30, 2006 21:31
First comment: 2 September, 2006 2 comments written
Brilliant! Hahaha! Thankfully you didn't make it to "VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impotent" or anything. Yech.
Dentarthurdent December 1, 2006 00:16
First comment: 28 November, 2006 4 comments written
The list could go on and on...
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Imperial "Die, rebel scum!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Impractical "VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
wields an opulent throneMethought I saw the footsteps of a throne
Which mists and vapours from mine eyes did shroud--
Nor view of who might sit thereon allowed;
But all the steps and ground about were strown
With sights the ruefullest that flesh and bone
Ever put on; a miserable crowd,
Sick, hale, old, young, who cried before that cloud,
"Thou art our king,
O Death! to thee we groan."
Those steps I clomb; the mists before me gave
Smooth way; and I beheld the face of one
Sleeping alone within a mossy cave,
With her face up to heaven; that seemed to have
Pleasing remembrance of a thought foregone;
A lovely Beauty in a summer grave!
        [ Sonnet, by William Wordsworth ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
! VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
collapses under his load!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Impassable "Move over, VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
, I need to get through!"
L December 1, 2006 17:38
First comment: 10 February, 2005 285 comments written
Nameless: My pun resistance gland exploded....
Vlad the Impecunious December 3, 2006 22:05
First comment: 3 December, 2006 1 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
hits! Your purse feels lighter.
Vlad the Vaunted February 21, 2007 20:20
First comment: 21 February, 2007 1 comments written
"Ooh, everybody knows I'm the BEST EVER!"
Grognor April 21, 2007 02:57
First comment: 4 April, 2007 1161 comments written
Excellent as hell. This is Nameless's best comic.
1338h4x May 11, 2007 00:15
First comment: 19 September, 2006 102 comments written
Brilliant.
kuribo October 4, 2007 14:32
First comment: 5 September, 2007 3 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Imbiber- "-Hic- Lemme tell yaThe arrow of choice of the samurai, ya are made of very
straight bamboo, and are tipped with hardened steel.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
shomethin, buddy. You ain't -hic- gettin' this Candelabramum. -hic-
Me December 21, 2007 21:31
First comment: 1 March, 2005 4 comments written
While I think this is good stuff, I think this would have worked better as a series. All start with from 2 and 4 and ends with one of the others.
Eu March 22, 2008 23:54
First comment: 22 March, 2008 1 comments written
ROFLMAO!!1!!
The EGE November 16, 2008 02:04
First comment: 16 November, 2008 1 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the imperfect: VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
misses! VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
just misses!
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Impatient: "Just hurry up and kill me with a real weapon already!"
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Impeachable: "I did not have relations with that succubusThe incubus and succubus are male and female versions of the
same demon, one who lies with a human for its own purposes,
usually to the detriment of the mortals who are unwise in
their dealings with them.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
."
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Impoverishing: "I vant to suck your wallet dry."
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Imprinted: Read what? D - a runed VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.

Chilemonkey November 16, 2008 06:32
First comment: 4 November, 2008 6 comments written
Well hell, why not:
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the Imp ... imps ... little creatures of two feet high that could
gambol and jump prodigiously; ...
        [ The Charwoman's Shadow, by Lord Dunsany ]

An 'imp' is an off-shoot or cutting. Thus an 'ymp tree' was
a grafted tree, or one grown from a cutting, not from seed.
'Imp' properly means a small devil, an off-shoot of Satan,
but the distinction between goblins or bogles and imps from
hell is hard to make, and many in the Celtic countries as
well as the English Puritans regarded all fairies as devils.
The fairies of tradition often hover uneasily between the
ghostly and the diabolic state.
        [ A Dictionary of Fairies, by Katharine Briggs ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
: "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!"
Natso June 1, 2009 20:40
First comment: 1 June, 2009 1 comments written
VladVlad Dracula the Impaler was a 15th-Century monarch of the
Birgau region of the Carpathian Mountains, in what is now
Romania. In Romanian history he is best known for two things.
One was his skilled handling of the Ottoman Turks, which kept
them from making further inroads into Christian Europe. The
other was the ruthless manner in which he ran his fiefdom.
He dealt with perceived challengers to his rule by impaling
them upright on wooden stakes. Visiting dignitaries who
failed to doff their hats had them nailed to their head.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
the impediment ^_^

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