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Friday, 15 December, 2006

by azgor

------ \|.@%!\| ######@.)%%\| ------ @ "A general store! And thank goodness it has..." @ "Greetings, Sir!"	------ \|.%%!\| ######@@)%%\| ------ @ "The Acme Corporation has entrusted me to show you..."	------ \|.%%!\| ######@@)%%\| ------ @ "...the handiest and the dandiest thing you've ever seen!"	------ \|.%%!\| ######@@)%%\| ------ @ "And don't you want to know how it works?"
------ \|.@%!\| ######@.)%%\| ------ @ "Well first you get an ordinary appleNEWTONIAN, adj. Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when. [ The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details...."	------ \|.@%!\| ######@.)%%\| ------ @ "Then you get out the tool that's not a slicer or a dicer..."	------ \|.@%!\| ######@.)%%\| ------ @ "It's not a chopper in a hopper. What in the hell could it possibly be!?"	------ \|.%%!\| ######@.@%%\| ------ @ "Moj-O-Matic!"
SPLORT! ------ \|.@%!\| ######@..%%\| ------ @ "It instantly turns apples into applesauce!"	SPLASH! ------ \|..%!\| ######@..@%\| ------ @ "It turns oranges into orangeWhat was the fruit like? Unfortunately, no one can describe a taste. All I can say is that, compared with those fruits, the freshest grapefruit you've ever eaten was dull, and the juiciest orange was dry, and the most melting pear was hard and woody, and the sweetest wild strawberry was sour. And there were no seeds or stones, and no wasps. If you had once eaten that fruit, all the nicest things in this world would taste like medicines after it. But I can't describe it. You can't find out what it is like unless you can get to that country and taste it for yourself. [ The Last Battle, by C.S. Lewis ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. juice!"	SPLAT! ------ \|..@!\| ######@...%\| ------ @ "It quickly scrambles eggs!"	SPAM! ------ \|...!\| ######@...@\| ------ @ "It even opens tins!"
SPLOOSH! ------ \|...@\| ######@....\| ------ @ "And did I mention how easy it is to clean?!"	------ \|....\| ######@..@.\| ------ @ "This mar- velous device can be yours today for only one easy payment of 29,995!"	------ \|....\| ######@..@.\| ------ @ "What do you say, is it a sale?!"	You faint from lack of food! ------ \|....\| ######@..@.\| ------
http://dudley.nicolaas.net

Apologies to L. Gallagher!

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
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